You did not choose to be who you are today (or did you?)

by | May 10, 2019 | Blog, Personal Development

  • You did not choose your parents or your relatives
  • You did not choose your looks or the color of your skin
  • You did not choose your genes
  • You did not choose your ethnicity
  • You did not choose your country of birth
  • You did not choose the religion you were born into
  • You did not choose your childhood or your upbringing
  • You did not choose your first name or your family name
  • You did not choose your parents’ expectations of you
  • You can’t help if your parents think you are an extension of themselves
  • You can’t help if your parents have dreams for you
role modeling             white mother and blonde baby

Much of who we are were set during our childhood, through influences that include religion, culture, family, friends, schools and local communities. They instill beliefs, values, norms and principles for living. Those create a person’s mindset. Your mindset sets the course of your life. You may be a person who accepts, “This is who I am” or “This is how I am” and accept who you are, where you are and what life brings you, but….you could also change it. How?

Change your mindset, change your life.!!!!

The Jesuits have a famous saying, “Give me the boy for the first seven years and I will show you the man.” Have you wondered why McDonald’s markets ‘Happy Meals’ to children? Well, they are hoping to hook them in childhood and create lifelong customers. Over the years, all of us have complained about the path we are on and want to change it, but we do not know how. Many are living other people’s dreams (often their parents’) taking them on a path they may not be happy with. Most people do not understand the influence of childhood upbringing on their subconscious programming (that is running in the background all the time) and mindset, or do not know how to understand and change their ‘programming’. It is the mindset that drives a majority of our decisions – most of which we make automatically, without consciously thinking about it. Every one of us can choose to become the person we want to be.

  • You can choose who you want to be
  • You can choose your friends and the relatives you want to spend time with
  • You can choose to let your heritage empower (or disempower) your future
  • You can choose your country of domicile
  • You can choose the religion you want to practice
  • You can set your own expectations for yourself
  • You can dream about your future
  • You can plan your future
  • You can take massive action to realize your dreams
  • You can live the life of your dreams

Firstly, you need to go back and re-examine our mindset, largely created in your early childhood and memorable experiences (positive and negative). If you do not consciously change your mindset, your future will simply be an incremental extension of your current life till now. Once you change your mindset, your life could change – dramatically. Next, you must identify the mindset you want to acquire. It is important to note that identifying the mindset is not the same as noticing outwardly observable behaviors. It is not enough to notice that Elon Musk wakes up at 6 am and brushes his teeth from left to right. Emulating that will not help you much. Instead, if you figure out why Elon wakes up at 6 am, what he believes about waking up at 6 am, what he says to himself when he wakes up and the principles he follows when brushing his teeth from left to right (for what reason?), you could get somewhere. For example, if you want to be a successful business person, you need to identify the mindset attributes of successful business people. You could do the same for any field you are in, and seek out the mindset attributes of your role models in that field. Lastly, you must ‘install’ the desired mindset.

Now that you know that changing your mindset could change your life, how do you surface your current mindset, identify the mindset attributes of successful people you want to emulate and then embrace the mindset. That requires you to do many things over time.

I am coaching a select few individuals who want to understand and change their mindset. I have identified the attributes of a range of successful people – entrepreneurs, CEOs executives, techies, non-techies, scientists, doctors, Nobel Prize winner and others. You can learn more about the mindset coaching I offer at https://www.ismartandsuccessful.com//books/. Of course, feel free to reach out to me.

P.S. Most people read articles like this but take no action. Think about it, take action, give me a call,.. If you found this article useful, please share it with your network – connections, groups, Facebook, twitter, etc.